Is pipe-smoking your dirty, little secret?

Last night I drove out to meet a good friend and fellow pipe smoker and collector who happened to be passing through town on his way home. My friend, who must remain anonymous, but who I will call George in this post, had a couple dozen pipes from his collection with him, some to show me, but most were for smoking on his sojourn.

George had some fantastic pipes; the most surprising pieces were a couple of Stanwells that one could mistake for super high grade Danish pieces. One had smooth grain that surpassed 99% of my collection. The other was a ring-grained freehand with which Bruce Weaver or Jim Cooke would have been delighted. These pieces were jaw-droppers.

Over the course of our hour long conversation, the subject rolled around to the George’s very real concerns that his clients might discover that he is a pipe- and cigar-smoker. For George, being outed as a pipe-smoker would have the same effect on his professional employability as my clients’ hearing that I have a gambling problem (In reality, I don’t gamble at all). These revelations could render us both unemployable.

Since I left George last evening, I’ve been rolling our conversation around in my head. It troubles me that we have come to the point in our society where being a pipe smoker makes one a pariah. Regardless of political leaning, we have become a nation of puritanical, coercive meddlers who, on the one hand sing paeans to “freedom” and, on the other hand, refuse to allow their fellow citizens to live freely. Among liberals, it is more socially acceptable to smoke dope than a tobacco pipe. That’s just ‘winking’ at the law, it seems. Smoking a pipe is still legal, although only the Almighty knows how long it will continue to be so.

While I don’t want to imply in any way that I am better or more noble than my friend, George, I have let my friends, family, clients, and acquaintances know, in no uncertain terms, that I am a pipe smoker. If I am an unacceptable friend, consultant, or family member because I smoke a pipe, so be it. To be blunt, if people cut me off for this reason, I don’t want them in my life, anyway. I have little use for narrow-minded, judgmental people, anyway.

Having lived my life as a fat man, I’m already well-acquainted with ostracism in both its covert and overt forms. So being judged for pipe-smoking feels like just a little more of the same prejudice justified for another reason. The way I look at it, if people are inclined to dislike me, I’m a mensch for streamlining their prejudicial processes.

If you’re keeping up with health forecasts here in the United States, you already know that this country confronts an obesity epidemic. A whole lot more people here – in fact a super-majority – will soon join the ranks of the “gravity-challenged.” it is not lost on me that my radical measures to leave this club (becoming a vegan, exercising, etc.) will once again place me in a minority. While it is unlikely that I will be despised for being healthy, I am still generous enough to put my pipe-smoker status out there so that the bigotry-inclined can still loathe me, however secretly.

To be completely candid, I didn’t really have much choice in being an out-of-the-closet pipe smoker. One of the unintended consequences of having developed a healthy readership here is that when somebody Googles my name, this blog pops up right at the top of the search results. I wish I were as well-known for my strategy expertise as I am for my passion for pipes. I’d be a whole lot more successful, let me tell ya.

It’s ridiculous, but even my brothers and sisters read this blog. Former girlfriends and wives read this blog (talk about loving having more and better reasons to dislike me!). New friends and prospective clients read this blog. I have about as much chance of success hiding that I’m a pipe smoker as I have of hiding my haunches. (I’d have used the word “ass,” but that would be indiscrete.)

Rick Newcombe, the author of In Search of Pipe Dreams and Still Searching for Pipe Dreams (a review of the new book is coming soon!) is one of the people who inspired me to NOT hide the fact that I’m a pipe smoker. Rick is not only very public about smoking a pipe and collecting, he’s also a very successful businessman who works in the media category. It would be difficult to be more “out” than Rick.

I have another good pipe-smoking friend who is an academic – and not only an academic, but an academic employed in medical research! He is so paranoid about being outed as a pipe-smoker that he participates in the pipe world using a pseudonym. That’s what we’ve come to in this country. Well-educated, productive, and highly respected people among our professional and managerial/administrative sectors have been coerced into behaving like outcasts or outlaws. It makes me crazy.

George’s situation makes me sad. It also makes me angry. I have had enough of the relentless onslaught of those who would rob the average American of his privacy and his freedoms. I’m a law-abiding, hard-working, tax-paying citizen as is George and all of my other pipe friends.

Is your life as a pipe-smoker a secret one? Is pipe-smoking your dirty little secret? Do your friends and co-workers know?

I hope that the comment stream on this post will be a place for each of us to share our stories. It is important that we don’t feel alone.

Comments

[jimbo]

My clients have always remembered me as that tubby chap who smokes a big pipe; the point is that they did remember me!

[Chrono]

I was once reluctant to let people know, but then I realized that it wasn't just some hobby or consumable - it became a true pastime that helped to define me. Once I realized that I didn't care who knew about it, because to know me is to know I'm a pipe smoker.

One of the problems with pipe smokers (and all tobacco consumers, really) is our reluctance and fear to openly display our pastime, whether it be for embarrassment or fear of retribution. While I mean no offense to your friends, they do us all a disservice by not being public about enjoying tobacco. I understand that people are fearful for their livelihoods, because I believe there are those in the anti-smoking crowd that are zealous enough to attack the livelihood of someone that smokes. But think of the help to our cause if folks like your friend in medical research was known as a pipe smoker. We're not shooting up heroin - we're engaging in a pastime that is centuries old. Smokers are responsible for allowing that stigma to develop. I, for one, am happy to let people know I am part of that proud tradition, and I make efforts to preserve it in the public and political realms.

[toby]

"I have another good pipe-smoking friend who is an academic – and not only an academic, but an academic employed in medical research! He is so paranoid about being outed as a pipe-smoker that he participates in the pipe world using a pseudonym."


There is another issue associated with this problem that is in some ways even more vexing than concern over employability. (And make no mistake about this. This is a very real issue. Already there are behemoth healthcare organizations that screen applicants [some even screen current employees] for tobacco use. Tobacco-related compounds found in your system mean that your application for employment is rejected. [For those healthcare organizations screening employees, they’re given a timeframe in which they must clean up their act – that is, stop smoking. If they don’t meet it, they are fired.])

This is apparently perfectly legal. The rationale is that smoking has been proven to negatively impact the health of the smoker. Health care costs associated with smokers are higher than with non-smokers. The healthcare organization saves on health insurance and other health-related costs by employing nonsmokers only. (There is no distinction made as to what the smoker smokes or how often. Chain-smoking cigarettes or a pipe full per week – it makes no difference if tobacco products can be detected in your system.) For the future, it is unlikely that this proscription against tobacco use will be limited to the healthcare industry. It’s likely going to affect a lot of other businesses that are interested in reducing their healthcare-related overhead costs.

It is the second issue, though, that really frustrates me. Pipe smokers don’t want to discuss the above. They’d rather rail at the government. They like to harangue the “nanny state.” But they are militant about their refusal to discuss the issue. For example, an online pipe-smokers forum that I belong to routinely censures conversations on this topic. It cuts them off. Sometimes it erases them.

This is distressing because if pipe smokers don’t care about this issue, who will? And it is not so black and white as the healthcare organizations are making it. It is not just about negative health consequences associated with tobacco. If it were strictly about healthcare costs, there are a lot of other activities one can choose to participate in that have statistically significant risks, maybe more so than an occasional bowl of tobacco. Motorcycle riding, for one. Pop Warner and high school football is another. Fast foods.

No, smoking has had its detractors since it was imported to Europe from its Native American roots. There are a whole bunch of people that just don’t like it and never did. And what they don’t like (and what pipe smokers won’t deal with: it makes a lot of pipe smokers super-angry just to mention it) – what is really rankling a lot of the antis is that they just don’t like the smell. They don’t like it when the tobacco’s lit, and they don’t like the smoke smell than lingers in the room or the car or on the clothes or skin of the smoker. The smell related to smoking is a driving component of the antismoking fervor. Smoke-smell is a very real emotional issue – for both sides.

It’s disingenuous, I tell you, this well-orchestrated attempt at the extermination of your right to your pipe in the name of health directed at you and George. And at me. I can’t believe that pipe smokers won’t talk about it.

[Bill Shalosky]

A lot of the younger guys (college age) that come into our shop only smoke their pipes at the shop or when they are alone at home. I think most of these fellas are afraid that other people will see them as weird, which given the percentage of pipe smokers out there I guess it is a little. Funny thing is, the few Ladies in the same age group seem to more willing to smoke their pipes out in the open.

[Frank]

Wow, that's scary.
Tell people long and often enough that pipesmoking is ugly: they will believe it. Tell them long and often enough that one group of people is better than another: they will believe it (as we can see in our german history). Tell them an oily hamburger is tasty: after a while they will believe it.
There is a bad tendency to educate people to take over opinions instead of using their brains. We are living in a world of advertising; not only for consumer goods, but also for opinions, for political programs and ethical drafts. It is always the same mechanism of manipulation.
We are educated to be consumers, not to be thinking persons. The only way out is: let's teach our children how to use their brains and how to go their own ways without fear. Less TV, more books. Less TV, more talks...

[Chrono]

Well put, Toby. I think many pipers have a head-in-the-sand mentality. They puff contentedly away at their cobs and Captain Black, or their Castellos and Westminster, blissfully ignoring the forces amassed against them. This is understandable. We seek out our briars to escape from or lessen the blow of negative things in life. Who wants to wrap a political fight around their pipe smoking? But the reality is that any smoker that isn't also a political activist on smoking issues has no right to complain as taxes increase, regulations increase, and we possibly approach levels reaching prohibition. If you're not calling councilmen, mayors, representatives, senators,etc when smoking issues arise, and you're not actively trying to encourage others to partake in pipes/cigars then you may someday find yourself without your cherished pastime.

In Atlanta the new smoking ban in city parks has a penalty for carrying a lit tobacco product that can be a $1,000 fine or jail time, all at a judge's discretion. Can you believe that? If you light up a briar in an Atlanta park you can be fined $1,000. I don't even live within the city proper but I sent letters to each city council member (for all the good it did).

["George"]

Okay, my turn. I guess Neill's given me a new name, so it's me, "George", the guinea pig for the article. I must especially address you, Chrono.

You are entirely welcome to chide me and others like me. It's your right, despite your not having a single clue about the circumstances. Neill graciously phrased what prompted this post in very general terms. For some of us, likely quite a few of us, our reality is just that. You may chide me for not being an activist. I accept it, because frankly, I can't care much about it. My reality is just that...mine.

You should know that I very much like my pipes. I enjoy everything about them and the exploration of my PT's. I enjoy holding them, cleaning and polishing them, and the relaxation I gain from enjoying them. In that, I'm sure all of us are similar. However, I'm not a "pipe club" kind of guy. The only pipe show I've gone to was enough to satisfy my curiosity, and I have no plans to attend another one. This is a solitary enjoyment for me, which I am afforded because of where I live, in part. We reside in a tobacco state, and when I enjoy my pipes, I do so not being able to see another home, for at least a quarter-mile in all directions.

Yet, as much as I like my pipes, I both like - and need - my vocation even more. Should it ever come down to having to decide between one or the other, it will be frustrating, but a no-brainer. This is my reality. Perhaps you won't ever understand that, as it's not your reality, and that's also fine. Lastly, may I tell you that if the nanny state one day prevails - highly doubtful due to tax revenues, by the way - and we are all forced to give up our pipes, no amount of activism will have helped.

Thank you for your kind words on the pipes I showed you, Neill. And as for those Stanwells, I' was delighted seeing your face as I turned them around to show you, while I was covering up the "S" on the stem. I've only owned one other ring-grain blast that began to compare with that Stanwell, a Former that cost me around $1000. I tried for three years to get that 1/4 bent Brandy to smoke well, but it remained a horrible smoker (for me) when I sold it. I've owned straight-grained beauties that cost up to several thousand dollars each, yet none featured angel hair grain like that Stanwell Dublin. I once sat holding that Stanwell and a Dunhill 4-star DR, and the Stanwell's grain was infinitely superior, despite costing me less than 8% of what the Dunhill did. Combined, they cost me around $180, but if you like them so much, I'll sell them to you. For a slight profit. :-)

[AlwaysLearning]

Yes.

[Chrono]

George, I think you may have taken my comments a little too far. I said that I understand that people are fearful for their livelihoods, because I believe there are those in the anti-smoking crowd that are zealous enough to attack the livelihood of someone that smokes. That was an explicit acknowledgment of the fact that some people can't publicly display their pipe smoking, or publicly fight for smokers' rights because of how it will affect their vocation. I understand "your reality". And as important as this is to me we're not talking about genocide in Sudan. It isn't worth someone's livelihood.

There are other things we can all do, though, and unless I'm misinterpreting you, you are stating that you have no interest in doing anything to support the longevity of pipe smoking, anonymously or otherwise. That is your choice and your reality, of course. Perhaps you're an older gentleman that sees fewer days ahead than behind. But I am in my thirties, and there are serious doubts that a pipe/tobacco environment even as we have now will be there for me in the future. I don't want to lose my pastime, or never see us regain the right to enjoy it in public. Unlike cigarettes or even cigars, pipes/pipe tobacco is very much a cottage industry. If you don't think that over-taxation, regulation, and stigmatization can wipe it out or at the very least make it prohibitively expensive for many of us then we will simply have to disagree.

[Edward]

I am in my thirties and feel a sense of doom for the tobacco industry in the United States. Where I live in California we vilify tobacco smoking while go to great lengths to show how we can buck Federal law on marijuana. It doesn't make much sense to me. I try very hard to live my life as I would want others to treat me. Understanding that tobacco smoke and odor is off-putting to others, I do not smoke until I can do so in an area/space that will not cause annoyance to others. I guess this makes me a closet pipe smoker, but it works for me and my family. As there is very little research/science on pipe smoking versus cigarettes, we get jumbled together. The anti-tobacco lobby/industry has so much momentum I believe they are 'too big to stop.' I sent a letter to my U.S. Representative and received a response that stated the "greater heath good outweighed my freedom to utilized tobacco."

[Chris Rivel]

As someone that works in the healthcare field, I understand his apprehension. My employer gives everyone a discount on their health insurance by signing a pledge not to smoke. The amusing part is, I don't know anyone who has said they wouldn't sign it, but plenty of nurses, including nursing supervisors, have to go outside every couple hours... *wink, nod*

My doctor and my pulmonologist both know of my hobby. My pulmonologist who works for the same company questioned why I signed it. I asked her if she had a glass of wine or beer now and then on the weekends. She said yes, and then I asked her if she thought she was an addicted alcoholic.... and then she dropped the subject.

["George"]

Thanks, Chrono. I appreciate your post, very much. I guess I've never thought of myself as an "older gentleman:, but I suppose I am. If the average life span is 80 years, then I'll soon be three-quarters there. LOL. I'm certainly considered too old to start over in a new career, except perhaps as a WalMart greeter.

Chrono, maybe we'll disagree, but I think I'm like most pipe folks, in that I have supported our pastime in buying a lot of pipes through the years, selling many to others who will hopefully love them more than I did, and frankly, investing in more PT than I'll likely be able to consume over the rest of my lifetime. Is this passive, or selfish? Maybe to you, yes. I do applaud your activism, Chrono, but I think it will be for naught. We live in a nation where, in certain parts of it, people are consistently blindsided by an assault on one liberty after another. Imagine being a new mother in NYC, and waking up one day to learn of Mayor Blooming Idiot-berg's desire to ban baby formula! But you know what? Eventually, he'll likely get his way.

Perhaps the irony of this post is that even if I lived under none of the restraints that I do, I would still be a quiet, solitary pipe smoker. That's just because of who I am. I don't buy or enjoy pipes or PT to impress anyone. Few will ever see them. Neill chose to use my circumstances to posit a post entitled "Is Pipe Smoking Your Dirty, Little Secret?" I don't consider it dirty, but it would indeed be a part of my life that's reserved for my private down time, regardless of everything else. It's really as simple as that. Best to you, and all of you.

[John Brill]

Many of us, having lived through times in which smoking was more acceptable, have a difficult time accepting the new "PC Evangelism". My first child was born in 1975. After she was born, the doctor came into my wife's hospital room, sat on the end of the bed, and they both smoked a cigarette. Nowadays such actions would summon a SWAT team!
I have a real issue with people or institutions that push their values on other people. Ex-cigarette smokers are the worst! The conversion process leaves them intolerant and opinionated....perhaps they still need to convince themselves.
I also do not understand the current "all or nothing" mentality. My doctor told me that he would not recommend smoking a pipe, BUT that pipesmoking was much less harmful than cigarette-smoking. Now this was useful information! As an educated adult I can sort this out and make my own choices.
I can only hope that at some point this witch hunt ends. I cannot envision a smoking ban that would be enforceable or successful.

John

[sam r vior]

Not at all, actually whenever not possible to smoke or with my kids outings or activities, I tend to use several Tshirts that as you can imagine, depicte pipe, tobacco and pipe smoking paraphernalia. Baseball Hats and stickers on my bumpers.

Most of the time, people tend to see me as something strange, an image of the past as I am turning 47 and some people could consider me "Old".

And I live in a small town, where I have seen perhaps two or three pipe smokers before.

Regards,

[John Goldberg]

I am a pipe smoker--all who know me figure that out very quickly as I smoke my pipe anywhere that will not result in an arrest. What I find so interesting is that in Mexico, where I spend the winter, I have never encountered a problem when smoking my pipe outdoors--even when dining.

I have indeed encountered problems in Chicago, here in the land of the "free", which is coming to mean "smoke free". Fortunately I am at an age where I don't have employers and need not worry about tobacco becoming taxed out of existence. My doctor tells me I am in good shape and I have smoked a pipe for over 50 years--so I guess it hasn't hurt me all that much. Reading all of the posts makes me grateful for my age, so I thank you all for this gratitude---keep on puffin'---John

[Richard Friedman]

"The way I look at it, if people are inclined to dislike me, I’m a mensch for streamlining their prejudicial processes." Neill you truly are a mensch in every way and I love the way you put that.

I have to deal with the public in a very personal way in my business. My clients have to live with me for a week. They are exposed to my pipe smoking and even get a look at a portion of my collection that resides in my pilot house.

In seventeen years of taking people on cruises in Alaska, I have yet to have one person object to my pipe smoking. The nearly universal response when I offer to get down wind to help them avoid any whiff of smoke is, " No I enjoy the fragrance of pipe smoke. My (grandfather/favorite uncle/father) smoked a pipe and it really brings back fond memories."

People notice when I smoke a different tobacco and often ask about it. Most even seem to enjoy the smell of latakia blends...not what I would have expected.

Perhaps they are intimidated, as I am the captain...but I think not. My experience is that people find pipe smoking quaint, retro and somewhat charming, not their typical reaction to cigarettes or cigars.

I think George might be surprised at how little disapproval he would encounter should he "come out".

[swingerofbirches]

This is something I struggle with. Like Chris above, I also work in healthcare and the corporate pressure to refrain from all forms of tobacco is very high although a decent percentage of co-workers still smoke. (Although, I find no kinship with the cigarette smokers who throw their butts everywhere and are perfectly content to blow smoke all over non-smokers coming in and out of the building.)

I also find this subject a tricky one because of religious affiliation. I know a lot of folks who's best cigar and pipe smoking friends were met through their church, but exposing yourself as a smoker of any kind in that environment is a scary one.

Its not that there aren't both people from work and church that know about my love for pipes and cigars...I'm just VERY selective about who I tell.

I'm a pretty private person so I suppose that its in keeping with the way I deal with a lot of personal information about myself, but my cigar and pipe smoking is something that most people only find out about once they've crossed that line into friendship.

[Klejdi]

I resumed the comments in the article after a message exchange with a Flickr member. Sometimes I surf in search of tobacciana-related photos. Two days ago I found some very nice ones, of tobacco fields in Kentucky. After complimenting the photographer, I was asked if my origins were from Kentucky. I replied that I was a pipe and tobacco smoker. Later, I received another message advising me politely on the dangers of tobacco. I have never been to US but I assume that it must be pretty scary for smokers being pointed out and discriminated against. In my country, Albania, smoking is part of daily culture and in sign of friendship men offer cigarette to each other when they meet.